Skiing Etiquette

While the verdict on my new Head MoJo XP boots is still out, i thought i'd spend a moment reminding the world at large of appropriate skiing etiquette. The boots, so far, are great, too good for me, i think, and they're digging into my ankle a bit but so far in a totally different league to my old Salomons. Extremely comfortable, very flexible, and i really feel more confident in them. Anyway, the full review will happen only once i've had the heat moulding done.

The purpose of this post is to remind the (expletive removed) today that wiped me out in Chatel of what he should have done, instead of just skiing off like the (insult removed) he so obviously is while i lay fuming in the snow. i suppose the chances of him reading this (because he probably can't read) are slim, but you've got to try.

According to ski-injury.com the most common way to remove yourself from the gene pool, after avalanches, is to impact with another person or (non-snow related) object, like a tree.

And after doing and watching a fair amount of skiing, this is self-evident. All you have to do is watch a pisted slope, any slope for any period of time. The slope will be empty, and then, 2 seconds later, seventeen million people will come down it at the same time, all at different speeds, with different abilities, in different directions, then nothing, then oodles of people again.

People on a ski slope tend to bunch, like cars on a highway, so this is the point where you're most likely to have a collision, and therefore, where you need to take the most care.

Some easy rules to get you (and me) down safely:

Axiom 1: The skier in front has priority.

• Quite obvious really. You can't see the people storming down the slope behind you, so you always need to look out for the people in front of you.

• Adapt your speed to the conditions and the size of the crowd. Blue slopes are slow slopes, reds are fast, and blacks are fastest. If you want to go fast, do so on a slope reserved for "Bon Skieurs", of which there are plenty and which are usually empty. Anyone can go fast on a blue, and no one is impressed if you do.

• Usually, you only need to look out for the skiers down the slope from you, however, if you are traversing the piste, then "in front of you" now includes skiers both up and down the slope. If some excellent skier is making nice tight turns down the fall-line on the side of the piste, and you traverse in front of him or her, then you can't expect him or her to stop - gravity just doesn't work like that.

• When setting off from a stop, always look up and down the slope, and preferrably don't set off at all if there are other people close by.

• If you do have a collision (but really, how could you if you obeyed these rules?) then you need to stop, and make sure your opponent (?) is OK, before setting off again, even if it was their fault.

Axiom 2: Stopping in the middle of the piste is dumb.

• Always ski predictably. If you're skiing the fall-line and suddenly remember a dental appointment, don't just stop. There's probably twenty people behind you expecting you to just carry on.

• If you need to navigate, catch your breath, check your email, or ponder why you've elected to throw yourself down a slippery sheet of ice on a cold and wet day in an environment that wouldn't normally sustain human life, then this can all be done from the side of the piste. Try not to make an impregnable line across the whole piste. That just makes the target easier for a skier ignoring Axiom 1 to hit.

Axiom 3: Safety signs are always right.

• Because you aren't insured if you ignore them. If the sign says "falaise" then there really is a cliff there. If the off-piste you love so much is closed because of avalanches, then is it really worth skiing it? Read this if you think avalanches only happen to other people.

• If the sign says "Ralentir" or "Slow" then this is so that you don't kill someone at high speed. Slow is not putting in one turn. Slow is using your poles to move forward.

• If the sign says "Danger - Croisement de Pistes" then, surprisingly, there's a crossing of pistes ahead and you don't want to hit someone doing the same speed as you, so slow down and remember that, since you're now traversing, you need to look above and below you to get across in one piece.

Actually, besides the incident with the hit-and-run retard in Chatel, we had a really really nice morning. We tried the Brocheaux Snowcross, which was really awesome.


And yes, sadly, once in a while, we do get some cloudy days in France. This is taken on the Chaux Fleurie off-piste on the way down to Lindarets.